More Significant

"...count others more significant than yourselves."

Another version of the same full phrase is: "Do not act out of selfish ambition or conceit, but with humility think of others as being better than yourselves."

It's not at all difficult to understand the meaning of this instruction.  The difficulty lies in application.

The first half seems straightforward.  "Hey, I'm not particularly selfish, nor conceited and I left ambition back a couple of decades in the past...".  Of course, if the comparison for 'selfish' is the society around us... let's not push too hard here or I might get squeamish.

The second half begins to show us the real depths.  If that's the bar, I'm going to fall pretty short.  Especially in an age pursuing self-esteem and self-actualization, this is an anathema, no?  I could elaborate on how self-esteem and self-actualization are best pursued through self-less-ness, but I'm interested in another facet.

 It's hard to imagine what it might be like if we really "considered others as better". So what if we lower the bar? Let's just begin with considering other as equal to ourselves.  I'm not talking about "All mean are created equal ...  are endowed by their creator with certain unalienable rights."  We could launch from there into politics and geopolitical power-plays.  No, let's just stick with the day-to-day stuff:

When there's conflict over the best path to pursue.
When there's a difference of opinion.
When we - just - want - different - things.
Who wins?

Yes, sometimes we can find win-win scenarios.  And the very best leaders and politicians aim for that.  But it is misleading (at best!) to pretend that's always possible.  It's not.  So.  Who wins?

If we are really equal, if we both really have equal 'claim' to the outcome: do I push for my desire? Do I permit what I think is a less-than-perfect decision?  Do I have the humility to recognize that not only may I be wrong, but I am, frequently enough, that someone else's ideas deserve to be tried?

Actually putting that one into practice is pretty hard.  And it's only the low bar.  Now I begin to see the real measurements of 'selfish ambition or conceit'.   The flip side of, "If you want to know what to do, look at what you believe" is, "If you want to know what you believe, look at what you do."  You could as easily say, "If you want to know who you are, look at how you behave."

This can go down layer after layer.  Is there some limit? I don't know.  I feel like I will never ever ever 'get there'.  But I can start walking, and I can lean on grace, so there's hope.