Minority Report

A swiss friend invited the kids over to make special breads for St. Niklaus eve (Dec  5th)

    Last night I took care of an older gentleman (with a heart attack).  His wife related an interesting story.

   Many, many years ago, they were married.  Then he left and moved to India for 20 years.  There, he met and also married another woman.  A few years back he returned  again to Bangladesh and moved back in with his first wife.  She looked me straight in the eye and, clearly imagining what I might be thinking, said. "What should I do? This is Bangladesh."  Her tone was even and completely unaffected.  It wasn't even resigned - just matter-of-fact.

   The subtext was, "What? He's my husband.  He is my standing in society.  No, equality is not a thing to be expected.  Without him I have nothing.  So, I accept that he had/has another wife."

   I knew polygamy existed in BD; this is merely my first up-close exposure to it.  I came home and discussed it with our house helper (who is christian - a small minority here).  She said, "Yeah.  Muslims have too many wives.  1, 2, 3. sometimes more!  Christians and Hindus don't."  That makes it sound like it's everybody - it's not, but it's around.
   What struck me about her comment was the exact same matter-of-fact tone.  Living in a society where you are a small minority (or a powerless group) you can have an identity or set of rules that are completely different from that of society at large, yet you must accept the larger society's rules as fact.

  This is probably how minorities have felt throughout time, from first-century Corinth to modern-day Bangladesh.